This week has been an emotional rollercoaster for a variety of reasons, chief among them is the return of my parents. Despite the work I’ve done, they still throw me. Guess it took me a while to walk into the woods and it will take me a while to walk out.
They are only in town for a week but their arrival is a good reminder that I need my own place and in the words of a friend: “it’s time to get unstuck.” I am the product of my parents, thus they have the ability to trigger me which I have to constantly remind myself is an opportunity for growth.
I have to say I’ve come a long way in the past few years and it’s a testament to the work I’ve done that I am better able to handle myself and my interactions with them. The awareness and knowledge that I have a choice in the style of dance I do with them is huge. The change in patterns is noticeable as is the need to do things differently for myself. In the end my interactions with them are filled with insight, shift and sometimes, joy and peace.
In the words of a wise friend: “awareness is great, but it’s just awarenes if you don’t take action.” In the moments I engage with them I choose actions which are vastly different from what old me would have done and when I fall back into old patterns I am conscious of doing so. In the meantime, I’m reflecting on my future actions and contemplating a different path, one that will be filled with what’s best for me.